Inspirational
The Villain
There were times in my life where I was the villain in someone else’s story. I acknowledge that, I am regretful for hurting people and I am working on forgiving myself for it.
Heart In Hand
Heart in Hand. Because that’s who I am. What brings me the most fulfillment is genuinely connecting with people and the only way to do that is through vulnerability.
I've Come a Long Way
Art has saved me twice. First as a child, creating art was the only thing that helped me deal with the constant terror and destruction in my household.
When I am in Nature
There is no place I’d rather be than the outdoors - free and inspired. Taking my art back into the inspiration it came from, and posing with it, is everything to me. ⠀
On the Topic of Transformation
I am acutely aware of how habits run my life and I have had to harness them in order to transform who I am. I appreciate big changes such as a move across country because it gives me the ability to jump-start the transition into new habits and therefore acquire new thoughts, new patterns, new behaviors, and eventually a new self. ⠀
Smashing Patriarchy in Shilong
These were taken in Shillong, one of India’s Matriarchal societies 🙌🏽. What a beautiful place. Some people called the women who ran the city “rude.” I liked them. They were strong and determined. They had no false pretenses. We ran into incredibly joyous Kashi women too. What isn’t there to be joyous about when you have smashed patriarchy?
Muse
There are certain energies that inspire me the most. I seek them out, crave being in their presence. A short interaction is all I need to sustain my creativity. It can be energy from a person, a place, music, animals, experiences... options are limitless I just have to seek them out.
Phone
I feel like I’m being controlled by it. I don’t like that feeling and so I rebel on the weekends and take the control back.
Focus
One of the things that I struggle with when I want to make art is focus. As soon as I walk into my studio my brain starts firing in a thousand different directions. I think about all of the possible projects and this paralyzes me.
A Long Way
I’ve come a long way to stand where I’m standing - and I am grateful. Art has saved me twice. First as a child, creating art was the only thing that helped me deal with the constant terror and destruction in my household. After I got out of that situation, I took a long break from art and then it saved me again as an adult when I poured my heart and soul into my career (and the people I led) at UCSF and burned out from it. Art has given me purpose. It has helped me discover who I am and what I am capable of. It has given me a tremendous amount of inner power and confidence. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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I can’t wait to see what I will manifest in 2020.
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I can’t wait to see what I will manifest in 2020.
Meeting Malala
I had the incredible opportunity to meet Malala at Mass Women's Conference. She has been my hero for many years. Although I cannot relate to getting shot by terrorists for standing for what I believe in, I relate in that what I endured as a child has made who I am today - someone who relentlessly pursues rights for women by bringing awareness to the issues such as equity in the workplace and domestic abuse.
Matriarchal Strength
Who were they? Did they all share the joy and love and creativity that I see within my ma and Aita? What sacrifices did they endure? What were their accomplishments? What were their fears? Who did they love? Who broke their hearts? What were their secrets?
Destroyers and Creators
Last night I was laying in bed thinking about how amazing it is that I am manifesting art into the world. Let the destroyers destroy. I will remain a creator. I was born to create. ⠀⠀
Heartbreak
Memories, I’ve learned, can be both a blessing and a curse. It’s easy to get stuck in a loop of them, wanting something back that is gone. I’ve lived in this hell before and I’m grateful for the lessons I’ve learned from getting out of it.
Psychedelic
Colors make me feel joy. Pure joy. Perhaps the way people feel when they take psychedelic drugs. I’m addicted to the process - especially with resin art. When I drop the vibrant inks into the resin and watch it take form, I stand there transfixed and nothing else matters. The colors make me present; and when I am present, I am joyous. How could I not be? Life is magical when I create.
Namaste
My soul honors your soul. I honor the place in you where the entire universe resides. I honor the light, love, truth, beauty & peace within you, because it is also within me. In sharing these things we are united, we are the same, we are one. ~ Namasté
Marvel
Sometimes when I’m walking around I wonder, is anyone else thinking about how the sun feels on their skin or how the wind feels in their hair? Do they marvel at how life is growing through cracks in the sidewalk or listen intently to the songs of the birds? ⠀⠀⠀⠀
Valkyrie
“I live out loud now because I was forced to be silent for so long.” For me, living out loud... writing about it constantly & painting about it helps me. Others heal in ways that are not visible.
Profound Sadness
“I’m going through something very powerful, emotionally, and I’m pretty fucking grateful for that because it’s a reminder that I’m human, and I’m sensitive, and I have the emotional complexly to actually feel profound sadness”
Empathy for Lona
I thought about what it must have been like to be a 4 year old little girl taken away from an extended family that showered her with constant joy and love to then meet her father in the US - a man she didn’t know & who brought terror into her life - in a country that was completely foreign and with no money, immersed in a language she did not speak.
My Brother
It brings tears to my eyes to think of how he has grown from the baby boy I used to protect to a wise and strong man.
Chaos
I love to create because no matter how chaotic or even tragic life can be, I know that I am bringing beauty into the world. It was always my escape as a child. If I find myself spiraling about anything, I think of art and I am transported to place where the cause of the spiral no longer matters. Art has helped me control and channel my emotions better than anything ever has. If you are struggling with depression or anxiety, I encourage you create and I encourage you to share. Holding in that energy will only destroy. ⠀⠀
Existential Crisis
For a while I was having an art existential crisis. I felt like I didn’t really have direction and I was all over the place. Is my focus woman? Is it mandalas? Resin? Since I am not a full time artist, I don’t need to define a style and that gives me more freedom.
Groove
We are creating grooves within our eternally complex mind with every feeling, thought and action. I continually ask myself, what groove am I deepening now? What new groove do I want to carve out? Art is just a byproduct of my most important creation - myself.
Day Job
My role is all about relationships and there is nothing I enjoy more than getting to know and connecting with someone else - not even art. It certainly is not an 8-5 job. There are weeks where I can hardly find any balance at all - especially when I travel. But, I will always find time for a little art.
Nowhere Else
Sometimes I am present intentionally and then there are times I am present because there is nowhere else I’d rather be. It is in those moments I feel the most alive.
Alive and Magical
e are magnificent creatures capable of doing so many spectacular things and yet many of us are concerned about what we are not capable of doing. We take for granted that which can do effortlessly. When I think about these things I am filled with joy and gratitude. I am alive and I am magical.
Stories
I have learned and have come to accept that all stories have a beginning and an end. Some stories are incredibly short, others epic and long. Sometimes, it is the shortest, most simplest of stories that tell the most profound truth.
Connected
Twice I have had dreams come true and many many other times I have dreamt about someone that either contacted me the next day or I ran into. I believe there is something connecting us all. If we open ourselves to it, we feel it. I feel it all the time. I can’t stop feeling it.
New
As I was walking home today, a thought occurred to me. What if I didn’t recognize anything and everything was new? How magical would that be? Some might find that terrifying but I know I would be captivated. That which we think is ordinary is often magnificent if we really think about how it came to existence.
The Present Moment
Whenever I find myself lost in thoughts that are not healthy, I bring myself to the present moment. I use all my senses to be exactly where I am. The more I practice this, the better I get.
Truths
We can have many truths at once. In fact, we can have infinite! We should not limit ourselves. Life is not black and white. It is colorful. It is messy. It is so beautifully unpredictable. ⠀⠀⠀
Wrinkles
I have blossomed every place I’ve been planted and at times they were dark and dry places. Places where the sun did not shine, the soil did not nourish and there was no rain to cleanse.
Back to Art
Life events have that ability. The ability to take what you think you know about yourself and make it disappear. And then you are left there questioning everything. Who are you? What are your values? What are your needs?
Balance
I’ve learned that if someone withdraws to point where I cannot reach them any longer, the best way to love them and myself is to let them go in hopes that we find each other once again in the future or another life.
Toes
Ever since I was old enough to be self-conscious, I have been embarrassed about my toes. I have a genetic trait that makes my third toe curl under my second. Due to this my other toes fit improperly in shoes and become calloused.
Teachers
I have found that the right people make their way into my life when I need them. Sometimes, it is a completely new person. Other times it is a friend or mentor (or both) that I suddenly reconnect with. And when they come, they come bearing gifts - gifts of wisdom, gifts of inspiration, gifts of love.
Change
He came after me with fists, hangers and belts. The physical pain was nothing. I wasn’t afraid of it. I challenged him and stepped in front of his terror when it was addressed to anyone but me. It was the psychological abuse that messed me up.
Woman on Fire
Women expressing their sensuality is taboo and stigmatized in society. We are subjected to play a role. If we get the wrong type of attention, it is our fault. I have been criticized by people in my extended family regarding my posts.
31 and Just Getting Started
Today I turned 31. I can finally say I know exactly who I am. I am confident. I am fearless. I am creative. I am loving. I am a fighter and a survivor. I am complicated and at times contradictory. I am both right and left brained. I am what words cannot describe and I am constantly changing.
Letting Go
Much like an archeologist, I have excavated many ideas for new paintings from within the deepest parts of my soul. inspiration is flowing out of me faster than I have the ability to capture it. ⠀⠀⠀
Brighter the Light, Darker the Shadow
When you grow up with a father who abused you daily,
When you have a father who tried to convince you that your mother's miscarriage was your fault because “God was saving the family from having another disaster,”
Process
I feel like I get it. That I am starting to understand life, or at least that I am very conscious of it. I’m conscious of myself and my emotions. I am conscious of my body language and the language of others. I am conscious of the games that people play. I am conscious of my own mental traps.
Call Me They
When I first met Jonathan, their energy drew me in. Their compassion and love for others were palpable. I knew right away that I wanted to know more. A few months ago, Jonathan and I finally got the chance to connect, and I got an hour of time with this precious human being. Here is a snippet of their story.
Risk Taker
I am a risk taker. From the stories I have heard about my childhood, it seems that I have always been that way. I put myself in uncomfortable and scary situations on purpose.
The Talking Tree
There is an infinite amount of knowledge that we do not yet have about ourselves and the world around us. We are so limited by our senses and our minds. I often wonder - what colors am I not seeing? What sounds am I not hearing? What do I really know? What truth am I missing?