My first commissioned painting was 12 years ago in high school. One of the teachers at the school wanted to commission a landscape painting. It was a lighthouse on top of a hill - a place she went with her fiancé. At that point I had only been painting for 4 years. I hadn't quite understood the principles of shadow and highlights. I didn't know the proper way to layer landscapes nor was I a champion at mixing and matching colors. But I was thrilled about the opportunity and I worked diligently on the painting. I was proud of the finished product. It didn't look precisely like the picture but I was okay with that because it was a painting and therefor my rendition of the photo. Isn't that what art is supposed to be - expression?
Well, the teacher didn't think so. I still remember the look on her face when she first saw it. Disgust. "This isn't what I wanted" she said in a tone that was bitter, almost irate. I remember entering the room and her reaction, I don't remember much else. I can imagine now how crushed I was. How it stifled my will to paint for people. How it hurt my confidence.
But I persevered and moved past that hurt. People will always have their judgements on my work. Art is meant to be experienced and not all experiences are the same.
The biggest thing I learned? Always draft a contract before beginning a commission and always try your best to show the style or type of painting you will create to manage expectations.
(01.07.2017)
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Color is a focus of my work for a variety of reasons, but the main reason is for healing. My father was an angry and violent man. He took out his rage on his family daily and I took it upon myself to protect my mother and brother from him by becoming the focus of his fury. We didn’t have much, but my mother filled our home with colorful art to bring radiance into an otherwise dark place. I followed in her footsteps and escaped into vibrant art of all shapes and forms. Getting into the flow of mindful art creation has been the single most important part of my healing. I hope to share the happiness that colorful art brings me with others, especially children.